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Breast Augmentation Recovery Knowledge Base
Breast augmentation recovery? If you have had breast implants, how did your recovery go? What should I expect? How soon can I enjoy them? You don't understand. It is not a sexual thing. My breast are deformed, for lack of better words, after having children. I want them to look normal again. A penis is a sex organ; breast are for feeding their babies. Would a man sacrifice the his penis size/shape forever for his children? Now will someone please answer my question instead of judging. Thanks. Thanks "mommy"!
Recovery time for breast augmentation? I am planning on breast augmentation in the near future. I am a massage therapist, so when I return to work I will be really using my upper body. My procedure will be under the muscle. I need a realistic opinion on how long it will take before I can return to work. Help!
Does breast augmentation have a painful recovery process? I want to get my breast fixed my right boob is much larger than my left and you can tell. So I am looking into plastic surgery, but I am scared! Help!
Is the rapid recovery method of breast augmentation as safe as traditional method? Rapid recovery method for implants has a shorter healing period with no special bras, etc. It include some physical therapy. Most patients can resume normal activities within 48 hours.
What is recovery like after breast augmentation? I am considering having this done, and I want to know exactly what to expect after surgery and when I come home. I am a stay at home mom of a 2 year old and a five year old and I know this will make it more difficult.
Breast augmentation - recovery question????? I had a breast augementation surgery in Feb, 2008 - I have not gone to the gym ever since my surgery was done mainly because I am extremely worried that sweating and losing weight will change the look of my breasts. Is the change really noticeable after weight loss? do they get noticably smaller????
What is the typical recovery time after breast augmentation surgery? Time away from work, exercise, etc? I am curious as to how much time I would be off from work or the gym if I had this done.
Breast augmentation or implant recovery question? My sister is a mom of a 3 yr. old and an 18 mth. old and wants to get breast implants done. Her husband will only be home for three days and then has to go back to work. I don't live close enough to her to help - plus I work full-time. He comes home in the winter for a few mths. I think she should wait until then - Does anyone have any experience with this and will she be able to care for her children three days after implants??? She will have to lift the baby out of his crib and into his crib. I think she should wait. Any opinions would be greatly appreciated!!! BTW the implants will be "under" the muscle. Thanks!
I need advice for recovery from breast augmentation.? I had a breast enhancement a week ago and I'm still in tremendous pain. I am bruised down one side (even into the groin area), am very swollen, and even though I'm taking Hydrocodone, it does not seem that I'm getting much better. How long will this go on. I know I have a really low threshold for pain, but I had no idea this would be this bad. I am miserable! I was back to work after 4 days and I just count the minutes till I can come home, take a hot bath and go to bed. HELP!!!!
I am having a tummy tuck/breast lift/augmentation. What sort of recovery can I expect? What about pain? I have a desk job. Is it possible to be back at work in 2 weeks?
breast augmentation? I have been thinking about breast augmentation for a very long time. I have one C cup and one A. I don't plan on increasing the side that is a C I just want to even them out. I wanted to know if they feel real?? I also wanted to know how long recovery normally? or anything else that could be helpful.
Breast Augmentation BA, Tummy Tuck TT, Liposuction Lipo. Recovery time for each? May 15th is my surgery date. Has anybody had all 3 done at the same time? if so, where is the pain focused on? BA, TT, Lipo: On a scale of 1-10, 10 being Extremely painful what do you rate it? Which is the most painful of having all 3 done at the same time? Breast Augmentation, After the swelling heals how many sizes do they shrink? TT, when will I be able to stand upright? Lipo, I heard that this keeps you with no energy for like 2 wks, is this true? Anybodys feedback would be greatly appreciated. Hope to have a Healthy and Beautiful outcome.
Can someone who has been through breast augmentation please tell me all about your recovery period? My g/f recently had breast augmentation-sub-muscular implant surgery on Thursday.....she had to have emergency surgery to remove a hematoma she developed after her first surgery on Friday.....She has been home since Friday...... Can someone who has been through breast augmentation please tell me all about your pain following the surgery? When was it more severe and what all on your body hurt? When did you start actually feeling better? This is her 4th day after the second surgery and she still has quite a bit of pain. I just want to help put her mind at ease, as she is naturally worried and paranoid after the hematoma.
how soon can i exercise after breast augmentation? i'm having breast augmentation surgery this week and am a little nervous about recovery time, getting back to work and being able to exercise again. Anyone have any feedback?
Breast augmentation personal stories? I am planning on getting a breast augmentation summer of next year. I would love to hear any words of advice or testimonials from women who have had this procedure done, especially concerning recovery time and things done to ease the discomfort following surgery. Thanks!
How painful is breast augmentation? I was considering getting saline breast implants under the muscle and would love to hear about recovery from anyone who's had this done. They're not cutting the muscle but separating the muscle fibers. Can I be back to work in 5 days without lifting? Thanks!
I am having a tummy tuck and breast augmentation. What should I do to prepare, what should I expect? What should I expect the procedures to be like, and recovery? Any advice or helpful tips? Thanks so much.
What is the recovery time for breast implants?lift?Tummy Tuck...?? I am having a Breast Augmentation/lift, and a Tummy Tuck soon, and i wanted to know how long will it take to be out on the town, and party? How long will it take for the pain to be gone?
Breast Reconstruction Surgery Recovery Time? I am a breast cancer survivor, last year i had a double mastecomy, this last week i just started my breast reconstruction. Can anyone tell me how long recovery time is? I had expanders put in and i go Monday to have the bandages and drains removed -How long before he can start expanding and will i be able to lift and go out and not be in pain?? please tell me if you have had breast augmentation, or implants...anything like that
Have you had a breast augmentation or liposuction done? I like to see all the plastic surgery shows, but you never hear people talk about the recovery time. Plus, I don't know of anyone personally who has had either procedure done. I would like details pertaining to one or the other. How was the recovery? Was there any pain? If so, how bad was it on a scale of 1-10? After the healing, how do the implants feel? How does the body look or feel after lipo? Please give any other information. I am thinking about getting one or the other done one day, for myself! Thank you both for your answers!!! Very informative!!!
Breast implant-recovery question? I had breast augmentation surgery in Feb 2008. My nipples are extremely sensitive and painful. When does this go away?
Many questions about Breast Augmentation? I am 23 and considering possible breast augmentation in the future. One breast is an A and the other a full B cup (very uneven!)...and I'm looking to get full C's. I don't have children yet but probably will in the future...so breastfeeding is something to consider. I'm just wondering what the best route is to take? I don't want to look like a pornstar. I just want to look normal and EVEN-breasted. Anyone who has had this done, please give advice! Thank you! *If you had it done, how much did it cost? *Is it better to get implants above or below the muscle? Which way feels more natural? *Through belly? Armpit? Breast fold? *How long was recovery? *Saline or Silicone?
Breast Augmentation Behind or infront of the Muscle? Hi, Im getting my boobs done in 2 weeks. I would like to go for the round ones but have been told by my surgeon that due to my size because im petite that they would need to be placed behind the muscle. There is lots of pros and cons to this I know but I was just owndering if anyone has had this done and whether they would recommend it. Also whats the recovery and complications like with it!? Please help me!!!
I get Breast Augmentation surgery next month. I am looking for tips!? I am 27, one child 16 months, and a desk job. I am getting breasts next month -- from an AA to a C I am looking for people out there who have done this and maybe would share some things with me that you wish you would have known 1. Tips "to do" BEFORE the surgery 2. Tips for recovery 3. Or even tips on how to minimize the possible risks associated with the surgery Thanks in advance! Nervous and excited!
Need feed back on Breast augmentation? Has anyone had a breast augmentation done with the transumbilical procedure? What did you think of it? Please give me all info on this. Recovery, does it look good etc....
Do you have a breast augmentation, please give me details!!! Serious answers only!!! More than likely if all goes well, I will be getting a breast augmentation sometime next year, and I am leaning more towards silicone implants. My question is, how did your augmentation go pre and post op? What type implants you have, and why did you choose them? What did you have/need to do before surgery? How was your recovery, and what did you have/need to after surgery? How is the recovery process, the pain, how do you feel now? Now that you are healed, how is everything going? If possible, I want extremely detailed answers from people who have gone through this journey; I know everyone heals differently and has different recovery processes, but I want a general guideline of what to expect! Please don't be shy, thank you!!!
Breast augmentation in their 40s? I need to know if any ladies have had successful breast augumentation and breast lifts in their 40s, were they satisfied with the results? and what was the recovery time, weeks? days? any input would be appreciated.
Anyone out there had a breast augmentation....? I have always had really small unattractive breasts and feel very uncomfortable and embarrased being naked and intimate with a man so I have shut them out of my life. I would like to enjoy having a relationship and sex too, so I wanted to find out more details(cost, surgery, recovery) if I had my breasts enlarged. Please don't tell me some guys don't care. It doesn't matter to me because I care. Thanks!
If you've ever had a breast augmentation? I'm hoping to get a breast augmentation done in about 3 weeks. I've done a LOT of research about it but I just want to know from women who have done it. I know everything from pain to healing time varies from person to person but I would like to know your personal answers. Serious answers only please. 1. How long ago did you have it done? 2. How old were you? 3. Did you get saline or silicone? 4. Under the muscle? 5. How many days passed until you went back to work? 6. What hurt the most during your recovery period? (ex: arms, groin) 7. How much did you pay? 8. Were you happy with the results 9. What size were you before and after? 10. Anything else you would like to add? Thanks
Should I do a breast augmentation? I am 25 yo, just finished breastfeeding that I did for 2.5 years! My boobs r deflated after i stoped breastfeeding, 34A w/ stretchmarks - I am so not happy with the looks. I am 5'5, 109Pounds, have nice curves, butt etc, but my boobies r just killing me. Please tell me if I should do the boob job. Where should I have the cut: underarm, underbreast or around the nipple? Do i have to do correction every 5 years? whats better saline or silicon? Is it a big risk , will I have saggy breasts if i'll breastfeed in the future? How long is the recovery, how often to visit the doctor? Any referals in Riverside County LA or San Diego? I want to have 34C - this should match my butt & still look natural. Please advise!!!!
Looking for advice about breast augmentation?? I'm 23 years old and have been thinking about getting implants for a long time. I'm 95% sure at this point that I will get it done but I'm interested to find out what other's people's experiences have been. What i'm most worried about is the pain and recovery time...How bad is the pain, what do you do for it, how long until i can be back at work (desk job)? I'm also curious how much a GOOD boob job should cost. I'm just looking for pros and cons from other people who've had this done; any advice is greatly appreciated. Oh and please no lectures....My self-esteem is fine and I'm not expecting it to change my life or anything like that (I wouldn't want it to, I love my life as it is!) I just want to be "normal" (seriously, they are barely As!). Thanks so much!
Anyone in the gulf coast (LA/MS) have a breast augmentation? Please share your personal experience: name your doctor and location, let me know how consultation went, about surgery and recovery, and outcome good and bad. I'd like to hear real experiences (good or bad) using doctors from Louisiana or Mississippi. No creams or overseas travel, lol.
Anyone had a breast lift and augmentation? or do you know anyone whos had it done? how much it is ? and whats the recovery time like?
After a breast augmentation? My best friend is getting implants next month. What can I do for her or bring to her to make the recovery process easier? When my other friends have had wisdom teeth removed, I've brought over movies, and magazines, and their favorite soups, and ice cream and pudding and stuff. What kind of things would make her more comfortable? Maybe a gift card for victorias secret??
Only for those who have gone breast augmentation,PLS advise my foreign friend- a good surgeon and cost...? She's coming to the Philippines because of this.., as she heard that it's cheaper here than in her country. Also, any doctors that you can recommend, BUDGET details and how long is the process and recovery to determine her stay in the Philippines... PLEASE..,I need acurate detailed answers on the cost and recommended surgeons...Please don't reply with web sites....Thanks
Pain after breast augmentation (Women only please)? My friend got hers done in January, she was in a lot of pain, I got mine done Yesterday! but I'm not experiencing as much pain as I was told. Could it be that i'm much pain tolerant? even the nurse when I woke up after the procedure said I was very strong since I was ok in the recovery room. Day 2, what should expect? is this when I start hurting? Girls with same situation please let me know what your experience was like Linda: I went over the muscle too, didn't want it under for that very same reason, much more pain n healin time. I also can not sleep! I think it might be because I'm so excited I can't wait to see the results! K thx!
Tummy Tuck recovery? I'm looking for Real World examples of Recovery times from tummy tuck and breast augmentation surgery not what they put in the pamplets. How long does it REALLY take to recover and how painful is it?
Breast enhancement questions? I'm hoping to get a breast augmentation done in about 3 weeks. I've done a LOT of research about it but I just want to know from women who have done it. I know everything from pain to healing time varies from person to person but I would like to know your personal answers. Serious answers only please. 1. How long ago did you have it done? 2. How old were you? 3. Did you get saline or silicone? 4. Under the muscle? 5. How many days passed until you went back to work? 6. What hurt the most during your recovery period? (ex: arms, groin) 7. How much did you pay? 8. Were you happy with the results 9. What size were you before and after? 10. Anything else you would like to add? Thanks Ok, I'M GONNA DO IT. Please don't tell me not to do it. I just want to know what other people have gone through.
who has had surgery by daniel flemming ? i am having breast augmentation by Daniel Flemming in october, provided my loan application is approved ! and want to know if anyone has had complications with his surgery and how they found the recovery. I do trust in his abbilities but would love to hear feedback.
Having major plastic surgery......what to expect? Tummy tuck + boob lift and augmentation at same time? I'm having a tummy tuck, breast lift and augmentation (going up one cup size) done all at the same time.........on the 19th. Anyone had this done who can tell me what to expect as far as recovery time/pain management/ability to function, etc? I have all the "basic" info from the doc, just looking for opinions from those who have done all 3 procedures at once as far as can I lay in bed and read, can I not even lift my forearms enough to read, can one read on Percocet, etc.............I know I will need help with my 4 year old and keeping him away from me for the first week or so, and other "obvious" things, but I am in online school and I'm taking a break till 4/1. Will this be enough time? Will I be able to lay in bed and read a novel in between? I have a pretty high pain tolerance and any reference to pain in relation to gastric bypass and/or a c-section would be helpful. Thanks!
Has anyone gone to Thailand for breat enlargement surgery? Anyone gone alone? Has anyone ever travelled overseas for breast augmentation surgery? Thailand? What was your experience? I am doing it alone, and I'd like to hear from others who recovered alone for the following week. How is the recovery for the following week after the op? Many thanks in advance :)
Anyone had a tummy tuck? Been researching for a while, and I hope one day in the next 10 years to have one.... what was the recovery like for you?? I have heard it is pretty bad... I have had breast augmentation 5 years ago, and the recovery was pretty bad for the first few days..... thanks
no period 1 month after skipping placebos? I have a question...I was on birth control, and was having a breast augmentation, so I skipped my placebo pills last month so I wouldn't have a period during my surgery or recovery. I did have some spotting a week or so later. However, I am now through my new pack and on my last day of placebos of this pack, and I still have not had a period. Should I wait until my period starts to start my next pack, or should i go ahead and start tomorrow??? ps i do know that placebo pills are sugar pills. that is why i skipped them. to skip a break in hormones and therefore not have a period.
another clean one do not blame me xxxfunny or not xxx? A woman named Shirley was from Beverly Hills. One day, she had a heart attack and was taken to Cedars Sinai hospital. While on the operating table, she had a near-death experience. She saw God and asked, "Is this it?" God said, "No, you have another 30 to 40 years to live." Upon her recovery, she decided to stay in the hospital and have collagen shots, cheek implants, a face lift, liposuction and breast augmentation. She even had someone dye her hair. She figured since she had another 30 to 40 years, she might as well make the most of it. She walked out of Cedars Sinai lobby after the last operation and was killed by an ambulance speeding up to the hospital. She arrived in front of God and said, "I thought you said I had another 30 to 40 years?" God replied, "Shirley! I didn't recognize you!"
Breast Implants. What to expect? I am 18 and have lost 180+ lbs in the past 4 years. I used to have quite large breasts, but since my weight loss I have none and I mean NONE! I am going to get augmentation. I have done the research and I know the risks. I would like some answers from woman who have had augmentation. Some of my questions are. . . how bad does it hurt? how long was your recovery? how long did it take for them to drop and soften? do they look/feel natural? how bad are the scars? how much did yours cost (the surgeons I've asked have told me vastly different answers. From $2,500 to $10,000) are you happy with the results? any addtional tips that you think might help me. Any one who reads this and is thinking about critisizing my decision or tellign me I'm too young blah blah blah, don't bother I've already made my decision and no one has the right to judge me for it. I really appreciate any answers anyone can give me.
Do you want to hear a joke? A middle aged woman has a heart attack and is taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she has a near death experience. During that experience she sees God and ask if this is it. God says no and explains that she has another 30 years to live. Upon her recovery she decides to just stay in the hospital and have a face lift, liposuction, breast augmentation, tummy tuck, etc. She even has someone come in and change her hair color. She figures since she's got another 30 years she might as well make the most of it. She walks out of the hospital after the last operation and is killed by an ambulance speeding up to the hospital. She arrives in front of God and complains: "I thought you said I had another 30 years. God replies, "I didn't recognize you."
Fat Grafting? Can anyone give me some information on fat grafting on lips for lip augmentation? Do they have to harvest fat from somewhere else or something? Also what about breast augmentation that transplants fat into the breasts from other areas of the body? What do those results look like, what's recovery time, pain, scarring, ect? Will getting fat injected into the breast make the breasts sag less like implants would because that's my main problem-sagging? I'd like to go from a c cup to a d/dd cup. Don't post anything about be happy with yourself or c cup breasts are big enough. Just answer my questions. Thanks. I bit off part off part of my lip a few months ago and it's not going to grow back so I need to get my lip fixed. Also my breasts developed really quickly (I had c cups in elementary school) so they sag badly and I can't go even an hour without wearing a bra. I deserve to have a normal looking body. That's why I was wondering if fat transplanting into the breasts would stop the sagging as same as implants would.
One of my favourite jokes. Hope you like it too!? A middle aged woman has a heart attack and is taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she has a near-death experience. During that experience she sees God and asks if this is it? God says "no" and explains that she has another 30-40 years to live. Upon her recovery she decides to stay in the hospital and have a face lift, liposuction, breast augmentation, tummy tuck, etc. She even has someone come in and change her hair color. She figures since she has another 30-40 years, she might as well make the most of it. She walks out of the hospital after the last operation and is killed by an ambulance speeding to the hospital. She arrives in front of God and asks, "I thought you said I had another 30-40 years?" God replies, "Sorry, I didn't recognize you."
Pretty nervous..need re assuring words..? Tomororw morning I am having a breast augmentation done.... Silicone, 325 CC's through the nipple..I'm just really worried about the pain, Girls who have gone through this only.... Can you give me some advice and tips on a fast recovery?
near death......? A middle aged woman has a heart attack and is taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she has a near death experience. During that experience she sees God and asks if this is it. God says no and explains that she has another 30 years to live. Upon her recovery she decides to just stay in the hospital and have a face lift, liposuction, breast augmentation, tummy tuck, etc. She even has someone come in and change her hair color. She figures since she's got another 30 years she might as well make the most of it. She walks out of the hospital after the last operation and is killed by an ambulance. She arrives in front of God and complains: "I thought you said I had another 30 years!! God replies, "Sorry, I didn't recognize you."
NEAR DEATH EXPERIENCE: ,'A middle aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she had a near death experience. Seeing God, she asked if this was it. God said, "No you have another 43 years, 2 months, and 8 days to live." Upon recovery the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a facelift, liposuction, breast augmentation, tummy tuck, etc. She even had someone come in and change her hair color, figuring since she had so much more time to live, she might as well make the most of it. She got out of the hospital after the last operation and while crossing the street was killed by an ambulance speeding to the hospital. Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had another 40 Years?" God replied, "I didn't recognize you."
Baby or Boobs? My husband and I ere trying to have a baby for the past three months, but I also want to get a breast augmentation. I was thinking, if I get them done after i have a baby it is going to be harder to go through recovery and take care of a baby. But at the same time I don't want to wait any longer to have a baby. Does any one have any advice for me. Should I have the baby first then get my boobs done, or get my boobs done then have a baby? Please if any one has any advice !!!!
breast augmentation? i am going to get saline implants with an armpit incision and adding about a cup and a half, i would like to know about the recovery of that certain operation, my friend had silicone with an under the breast incision so is the recovery the same? no offense but i'm not looking for answer opposing it just answers that will help me out, but thanks for your consideration :)
Breast Reconstruction Surgery Recovery Time? I am a breast cancer survivor, last year i had a double mastecomy, this last week i just started my breast reconstruction. Can anyone tell me how long recovery time is? I had expanders put in and i go Monday to have the bandages and drains removed -How long before he can start expanding and will i be able to lift and go out and not be in pain?? please tell me if you have had breast augmentation, or implants...anything like that
Looking for advice about breast augmentation?? I'm 23 years old and have been thinking about getting implants for a long time. I'm 95% sure at this point that I will get it done but I'm interested to find out what other's people's experiences have been. What i'm most worried about is the pain and recovery time...How bad is the pain, what do you do for it, how long until i can be back at work (desk job)? I'm also curious how much a GOOD boob job should cost. I'm just looking for pros and cons from other people who've had this done; any advice is greatly appreciated. Oh and please no lectures....My self-esteem is fine and I'm not expecting it to change my life or anything like that (I wouldn't want it to, I love my life as it is!) I just want to be "normal" (seriously, they are barely As!). Thanks so much!
Looking for advice about breast augmentation?? I'm 23 years old and have been thinking about getting implants for a long time. I'm 95% sure at this point that I will get it done but I'm interested to find out what other's people's experiences have been. What i'm most worried about is the pain and recovery time...How bad is the pain, what do you do for it, how long until i can be back at work (desk job)? I'm also curious how much a GOOD boob job should cost. I'm just looking for pros and cons from other people who've had this done; any advice is greatly appreciated. Oh and please no lectures....My self-esteem is fine and I'm not expecting it to change my life or anything like that (I wouldn't want it to, I love my life as it is!) I just want to be "normal" (seriously, they are barely As!). Thanks so much!
Looking for advice about breast augmentation?? I'm 23 years old and have been thinking about getting implants for a long time. I'm 95% sure at this point that I will get it done but I'm interested to find out what other's people's experiences have been. What i'm most worried about is the pain and recovery time...How bad is the pain, what do you do for it, how long until i can be back at work (desk job)? I'm also curious how much a GOOD boob job should cost. I'm just looking for pros and cons from other people who've had this done; any advice is greatly appreciated. Oh and please no lectures....My self-esteem is fine and I'm not expecting it to change my life or anything like that (I wouldn't want it to, I love my life as it is!) I just want to be "normal" (seriously, they are barely As!). Thanks so much!
A longer life? A middle aged woman has a heart attack and is taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she has a near-death experience. During that experience she sees God and asks if this is it? God says "no" and explains that she has another 30-40 years to live. Upon her recovery she decides to stay in the hospital and have a face lift, liposuction, breast augmentation, tummy tuck, etc. She even has someone come in and change her hair color. She figures since she has another 30-40 years, she might as well make the most of it. She walks out of the hospital after the last operation and is killed by an ambulance speeding to the hospital. She arrives in front of God and asks, "I thought you said I had another 30-40 years?" God replies, "Sorry, I didn't recognize you."
Different person? A middle-aged woman has a heart attack and is taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she has a near death experience. During that experience she sees God and asks if this is it. God says no and explains that she has another 30 years to live. Upon her recovery she decides to just stay in the hospital and have a face lift, liposuction, breast augmentation, tummy tuck, etc. She even has someone come in and change her hair color. She figures since she's got another 30 years she might as well make the most of it. She walks out of the hospital after the last operation and is killed by an ambulance speeding by. She arrives in front of God and complains, "I thought you said I had another 30 years." God replies, "I didn't recognize you" star if it made you smile C:
Star if you think think this is funny? A middle aged woman has a heart attack and is taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she has a near death experience. During that experience she sees God and ask if this is it. God says no and explains that she has another 30 years to live. Upon her recovery she decides to just stay in the hospital and have a face lift, liposuction, breast augmentation, tummy tuck, etc. She even has someone come in and change her hair color. She figures since she's got another 30 years she might as well make the most of it. She walks out of the hospital after the last operation and is killed by an ambulance speeding up to the hospital. She arrives in front of God and complains: "I thought you said I had another 30 years. God replies, "I didn't recognize you.
How about this one, funny or not? A woman named Shirley was from Beverly Hills. One day, she had a heart attack and was taken to Cedars Sinai hospital. While on the operating table, she had a near death experience. She saw God and asked, "Is this it?" God said, "No, you have another 30 to 40 years to live." Upon her recovery, she decided to stay in the hospital and have collagen shots, cheek implants,a face lift, liposuction and breast augmentation. She even had someone dye her hair. She figured since she had another 30 to 40 years, she might as well make the most of it. She walked out of Cedars Sinai lobby after the last operation and was killed by an ambulance speeding up to the hospital. She arrived in front of God and said "I thought you said I had another 30 to 40 years?" God replied, "You're Shirley? I didn't recognize you!"
Different person? (joke)? A middle-aged woman has a heart attack and is taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she has a near death experience. During that experience she sees God and asks if this is it. God says no and explains that she has another 30 years to live. Upon her recovery she decides to just stay in the hospital and have a face lift, liposuction, breast augmentation, tummy tuck, etc. She even has someone come in and change her hair color. She figures since she's got another 30 years she might as well make the most of it. She walks out of the hospital after the last operation and is killed by an ambulance speeding by. She arrives in front of God and complains, "I thought you said I had another 30 years." God replies, "I didn't recognize you"
Please star if you laugh? A woman named Shirley was from Beverly Hills. One day, she had a heart attack and was taken to Cedars Sinai hospital. While on the operating table, she had a near-death experience. She saw God and asked, "Is this it?" God said, "No, you have another 30 to 40 years to live." Upon her recovery, she decided to stay in the hospital and have collagen shots, cheek implants, a face lift, liposuction and breast augmentation. She even had someone dye her hair. She figured since she had another 30 to 40 years, she might as well make the most of it. She walked out of Cedars Sinai lobby after the last operation and was killed by an ambulance speeding up to the hospital. She arrived in front of God and said, "I thought you said I had another 30 to 40 years?" God replied, "Shirley! I didn't recognize you!" Top Ten Ways to Tell if Martha Stewart is Stalking Your Dog: 10. There's potpourri hanging from your pooch's collar. 9. The dog's nails have been trimmed with pinking shears. 8. The dog toys are all stored in McCoy crocks. 7. The pooper scooper has been decorated with raffia bows. 6. That telltale lemon slice in the new silver water bowl. 5. You find liver and whole wheat dog treats stamped out with copper cookie cutters and decorated with royal icing using a #2 rosette tip. 4. Dog hair has been collected and put into wire baskets for nesting material for the birds. 3. A seasonally appropriate grapevine wreath adorns the front of the doghouse. 2. Your dog goes outside naked and comes in wearing an apricot colored virgin wool hand-knitted sweater with matching boots. AND THE NUMBER ONE WAY YOU KNOW THAT MARTHA STEWART IS STALKING YOUR DOG IS... 1. The dog droppings in your backyard have been sculpted into swans. What do you call 10 rabbits walking backwards? ... A receding hair line. A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his beautiful, blond, female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it, looked inside, slammed it shut, and stormed back into her house. A little later she came out of her house again, went to the mailbox, again opened it, and slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came again. She marched to the mailbox, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever. Puzzled by her actions, the man asked her, "Is something wrong?" To which she replied, "There certainly is! My stupid computer keeps telling me I've got mail!" Someone saw a blonde eating a Tootsie Roll Pop and asked her, "So, how many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll - Tootsie Pop?" Without a thought, the blonde replied, "Beats me, but it took almost the whole day just to lick through the wrapper." A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and help me, I have a jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get it started. Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?" The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a tiger." Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table. He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a tiger." He takes her hand and says, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then....." he sighed, ...let's put all these Frosted Flakes back in the box."
30 -40 yrs left? A woman named Shirley was from Beverly Hills. One day, she had a heart attack and was taken to Cedars Sinai hospital. While on the operating table, she had a near-death experience. She saw God and asked, "Is this it?" God said, "No, you have another 30 to 40 years to live." Upon her recovery, she decided to stay in the hospital and have collagen shots, cheek implants, a face lift, liposuction and breast augmentation. She even had someone dye her hair. She figured since she had another 30 to 40 years, she might as well make the most of it. She walked out of Cedars Sinai lobby after the last operation and was killed by an ambulance speeding up to the hospital. She arrived in front of God and said, "I thought you said I had another 30 to 40 years?" God replied, "Shirley! I didn't recognize you!"
Shirley's makeover? A woman named Shirley was from Beverly Hills. One day, she had a heart attack and was taken to Cedars Sinai hospital. While on the operating table, she had a near-death experience. She saw God and asked, "Is this it?" God said, "No, you have another 30 to 40 years to live." Upon her recovery, she decided to stay in the hospital and have collagen shots, cheek implants, a face lift, liposuction and breast augmentation. She even had someone dye her hair. She figured since she had another 30 to 40 years, she might as well make the most of it. She walked out of Cedars Sinai lobby after the last operation and was killed by an ambulance speeding up to the hospital. She arrived in front of God and said, "I thought you said I had another 30 to 40 years?" God replied, "Shirley! I didn't recognize you!"
How intense is lip enhancement surgery? (Recovery...etc...)? I'm no stranger to plastic surgery (breast augmentation), but was wandering what all is involved with this surgery...
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